Many people believe that sex starts from the mind and in reality, it is true. The mind is a more powerful sexual organ than even the genitalia because it’s where sex drive stems from.

It is believed in popular circles that dirty talk, at least the right amount is necessary for good sex, In fact, the internet is awash with suggestions on how talking dirty is the new game-changer. Research insists will lead couples faster to their pleasurable sexual satisfaction destinations.

While talking dirty seems to come easily to some people, it can be (extremely) awkward and unnatural—especially when you think it is sinful as a believer.

Some Muslim friends insist that the Quran says sex must be a form of worship and hence dirty talk is unallowed.

“If a man has intercourse with his wife, he will be rewarded for that, because he is doing something righteous and avoiding something unrighteous. This is what is stated in the hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)

“It was narrated from Abu Dharr that some people from among the companions of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “O Messenger of Allaah, the rich people will get more reward. They pray as we pray, and they fast as we fast, but they give in charity from their excess wealth.”

He said, “Has not Allaah given you things with which you can give charity? Every tasbeehah (saying ‘Subhaan Allaah (Glory be to Allaah)’) is a charity. 

Every Takbeerah (saying ‘Allaahu akbar (Allaah is Most Great)’) is a charity. Every Tahmeedah (saying ‘al-hamdu-Lillaah (praise be to Allaah)’ is a charity. Every Tahleelah (saying ‘Laa ilaaha ill-Allaah (there is no god but Allaah)’) is a charity. Enjoining what is good is a charity. Forbidding what is evil is a charity. Having intercourse (with one’s wife) is a charity.” They said, “O Messenger of Allaah, if one of us fulfils his desire, is there reward in that?” 

He said, “Do you not see that if he does it in a haraam way he will have the burden of sin? So if he does it in a halaal way, he will have a reward for that.”

(Narrated by Muslim, 1674)

Imaam al-Nawawi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

“The phrase, ‘Having intercourse is a charity’ – the word bud’ (translated here as ‘having intercourse’) may mean intercourse, or it may refer to the private part itself…

This indicates that permissible actions may become acts of worship if there is a sincere intention. 

“Therefore, having sex may be an act of worship if the intention behind it is to fulfill the rights of one’s wife, to treat her kindly as enjoined by Allaah, to seek a righteous child, to keep oneself or one’s wife chaste, to prevent both partners from looking towards or thinking of haraam things, and other good intentions. 

‘O Messenger of Allaah, if one of us fulfils his desire, is there reward in that?’”

(Sharh Muslim, 7/92)”


A  Muslim sect disagrees.

Some Christians also believe that dirty talk during sex is sinful.

Others believe that as long as a couple is married, the marriage bed cannot be defiled as in scriptures.

They quote Hebrews 13: 4 which says, “Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge” (NASB) as a reference point.

The Greek word translated “undefiled” is only used in this exact form four times in the New Testament, and it means “uncontaminated” or “set apart.” Hebrews 7:26 uses this word to describe Jesus Christ, our high priest, and James 1:27 says that “undefiled” religion is that which helps widows and orphans and remains unstained by the world.

The next sentence would go ahead to imply that the only thing that can defile or contaminate the marriage bed is fornication and adultery.

In other words, the sexual intimacy shared between a husband and wife is to be reserved for that couple alone.

Hence, talking dirty is fine if the couple has no problem with it.

What do you think?

Should Believers Talk Dirty During Sex?

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