Whenever I see a post on submission, in my lecturer’s voice, I jive. Reading through the comments takes me back to Black History month effortlessly. No racial difference, people attempting to use poetry  but it the rights to enslave all over again. And I have to ask, why in God’s name do you want submission? Jokes apart, Why?

Isn’t it funny how suddenly all religions finally agree? The subjugation of women is that big a deal and you begin to wonder what are these systems truly afraid of? But let’s not derail. In all sincerity, what does submission do for you?

Is it that anything you say is final?
Is it that you earn the right to do whatever you like?
Does it mean you will enjoy the benefits of slave trade, more TV, zero chores, rights to occasionally slap someone, piss on them,  cheat on them?

Is it for longevity? Does it cure cancer? Increase wealth? Improve sex and lovemaking or impress your bank account?
Do you need the submission of another to feel adequate, secure or someone to dominate so show your worth?

I have asked Christians and they have said,  Paul said it. It’s nothing to them,  but Paul said.  I will have you know that Paul also said, “bodily exercise profits little…”

Heart attack, obesity, diabetes, many disease are prevented by exercise. We know that now, but Paul didn’t know then, more examples abound but I have thought about these things, reconciling my faith with science, and putting scriptures in today’s context.

And it doesn’t diminish Paul in my eyes, I have opportunities he didn’t have. If he was writing today, he wouldn’t write that, if he was from Japan he would think different, if he knew Cristiano Ronaldo he won’t say so.And I’m pretty sure if he was in Germany today he won’t say women should keep quiet during meetings. And we don’t do “Holy Kisses” in Nigeria.

That’s why you should take principles and the spirit, not what’s written literally in the bible. “For the letters killeth” These are all in contrast to ‘[written] with the spirit of the living God’, ‘[written] on tablets of human hearts’, ‘the new covenant’, ‘the spirit’, ‘the ministry of the spirit’, ‘the ministry of righteousness’, and ‘Jesus’ who removes that ‘veil’.

On submission, if you are more knowledgeable and wiser than someone, you don’t have to ask for submission, the person will always defer to you, so if submission is the priority in your life, build yourself up that your spouse can always consult you on issues.

Nowadays, isn’t it ironic how the devil uses the “letters in the Bible” to break marriages? And many raving young men do not only demand submission from their spouses but every woman. I am talking boys whose only job experience is managing their own twitter/Facebook accounts. We have missed this submission thing indeed.

Let me use this badly written song as example,

“I surrender all… All to Jesus Christ…
“All to Jesus, I surrender, I surrender all”

Surrender is to stop resisting to an enemy or opponent and submit to their authority.

2. Give up or hand over (a person, right, or possession), typically on compulsion or demand.

Submission is the action of accepting or yielding to a superior force or to the will or authority of another person.
While both technically means giving up power, surrender requires compulsion. God is not in the business of forcing people to accept his will. That is why that song is bad and men who demand submission are not in his will.

If we must use Paul’s teachings, he says a woman must submit to a man who treats her like Jesus would and that is with unconditional love, respect and even dies for her. To emphasize only one-sided submission is to plant discord. One-sided submission is not submission. And by the way, you are not permitted to submit in everything, it caused the death of Sapphira, Ananias’wife.

The part of the Ephesians scriptures intrigues me, “This is a great mystery : but I speak concerning Christ and the church, nevertheless, let everyone of you particularly so love his wife even as himself and the wife see that he adores her husband ”

Love will always be the greatest principle, it has worked for even atheists, folks who believe in partnership. It has helped them stay married for many years, why can’t it work for religious people?

Photo Credit: Twelve Years a Slave.

Thanks for sharing.

We anticipate your response.

8 COMMENTS

  1. Comment:1) submission is not slavery
    2) ladies, do yourself a favour don’t marry someone you are not willing to submit to, but submit to the one you have married,it’s an act of obedience to God and a demonstration of trust for the man without which love is harder work. Besides, it’s the best way to get God on your side to protect you from his miscellaneous folly that is if you have married a…..
    3) If he however is leading you against the will of God, to follow him is called being dumb not submission.

    • Thanks for your responses Emmanuel. I appreciate. Many men seem to completely ignore the part where it is demanded for them to love totally. I also insist that marriage takes two people to submit.

  2. Wonderful piece. I wish I was one of the believers you asked? I really have a lot of reasons to tel You why we need it. And yes- It improve sex and lovemaking tremendously. However spiritually I believe its because God says so of submission . To the extent men were told to love their wives as themselves is the extent women are to submit. There is beauty in both. So to ask “Why in God’s name do you want submission?” is as same as asking the woman “Why in God’s name do you need love?”

  3. The problem about submission especially I Africa has not been about whether with.em are willing to submit. I dare say women have been submitting to their husbands, going above and beyond to do everything in thier power to make their marriages work. Even bending till thier backs break.

    The problem is that men have not kept to provide held up thier part of the bargain. That is to love thier wives like Christ loved the church. African men ( I use this word loosely, as we still have responsible ones) need to realise that times have changed , cultures are evolving but they have refused to evolve because they would rather want to see thier women subjugated.

    It’s about African man that would want his CEO wife to return from work to pound yam. That is his way of ensuring that he puts his wife in check.

    The meaning of the word submission has been so abused, they would rather hold women back with out dated traditions.

    Women are now demanding for better treatment in marriage and it’s suddenly a problem because our mothers endured “hell” with their spouses , it is now assumed that longetitvity in marriage equals success.
    I have interacted with a number of women from that generation. They all mostly wish they had more opportunities, taken more risks, never married early, walked away from abusive marriages etc.

    They all feel cheated.

  4. The problem about submission especially In Africa has never been about whether womem are willing to submit. I dare say women have been submitting to their husbands, going above and beyond to do everything in thier power to make their marriages work. Even bending till thier backs break.

    The problem is that men have not kept to or held up thier part of the bargain; That is to love thier wives like Christ loved the church. African men ( I use this word loosely, as we still have responsible ones) need to realise that times have changed , cultures are evolving but they have refused to evolve because they would rather want to see thier women subjugated.

    It’s an African man that would want his CEO wife to return from work to pound yam. That is his way of ensuring that he puts his wife in check.

    The meaning of the word submission has been so abused, they would rather hold women back with out dated traditions.

    Women are now demanding for better treatment in marriage and it’s suddenly a problem because our mothers endured “hell” with their spouses , it is now assumed that longetitvity in marriage equals success.
    I have interacted with a number of women from that generation. They all mostly wish they had more opportunities, taken more risks, never married early, walked away from abusive marriages etc.

    They all feel cheated

  5. The reason why God asked Women to submit is because they already have a loving nature, but often get rude or disrespectful easily, and that eats away marriage to the extent of eventually tearing it apart if unchecked.
    On the other hand, God demanded that men love their wives because the easiest way to get a mentally, psychologically and emotionally balanced woman to give it all to a man is if she feels loved.
    So herein lies the need for Wisdom. Who puts the first foot forward does not matter, but if one brings the required attitude to the table, the other must respond with the counterpart requirement, otherwise the “agreement to walk together” becomes skewed, poisoned and unfair.
    Now, considering the fact that culture demands that men fall in love with a woman and then approach her for a relationship, it is expected by men in those cultures that once the lady agrees to the relationship, she is bringing submission and respect with her, but often it is not so.
    In this case I usually blame women, not because I hate them, but I remind them of their tremendous power of influence and how that power can turn the tide or change the temperature of a faltering relationship at the snap of a finger!
    Men inevitably fall for women who shower them with love and still submit to them at the same time.
    Even if they misbahave, many a pub tale is full of admissions of guilt about how “i’m being unfair to her,” but I’m a man now, I don’t want her to realize the truth so that she doesn’t start disrespecting me.
    I for one, have experienced a situation where I loved the lady with everything I had, but she took it as weakness and regularly insulted me. I checked, and she was raised by a father who routinely rough-handled his women (and kept a string of them). He was her favorite parent!

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